Stop Inviting Shame to the Party
Sometimes, when we are feeling a deep sense of loneliness, discontent, or pain, self-judgments and negative beliefs show up too. It’s like they get invited to the party every time. Even though they are the WORST guests.
They may have you believing things like:
You’re broken. You’re screwed up. You’re weak. You’re unlovable. You’re not enough. You don't deserve love or good things. You’re lazy.
Why does this happen?
Buying into those beliefs is you trying to make sense of the emotion.
It's you trying to get relief. Because when we make sense of something, we get a little bit of relief.
It's you trying to get rid of it.
But it doesn't work, at least not for long. Because while you might have made sense of your emotions by buying into a negative or critical belief, you also invited a truck-load of little shame monsters to your party.
Like I said earlier, they are the worst guests. They are insidious and relentless. They eat away at your energy and vitality. They have you believing things about you that aren’t true. They disempower you. They keep you stuck.
Think about this:
What if you're totally whole, and not broken at all?
What if you're not screwed up?
What if you're strong?
What if you ARE enough?
What if you are totally deserving?
What if you’re not lazy?
Read those again.
Imagine what it would be like if you didn’t bring all those negative beliefs along on your journey. If you just felt your feelings without having to make sense of them, perhaps you’d actually have fun at this party we call life.
I invite you to try it. Open up a loving and caring space for your emotions. To see what you might discover on the other side.